Thursday, January 29, 2009

Qvalis artifex pereo

The price of my servitude knows no limits. I have recently been employed as a waiter and so if you wish to see Sanjeet balancing footlong glasses on a tray that's full without breaking anything, please be my guest.

My workplace is in DOME Subang Parade.. And I personally don't get staff meals or discounts myself, so please don't beg for discounts. On the upside, the fellow waiters/waitresses, stewards and chefs are a joy to work with. The customers can be very nice, I recently received 3 great comments on cards personalised to my name.
One dude even told the manager its quite amazing I'm just a waiter:) - when I told him it was part time and I'm a 3rd year student he says its not hard to believe. Yes, a dream come true. I finally look my part as an intelligent person.


All my life (ok b4 the spectacles at least) I have been portrayed as a hopeless dumbnut. There was once when I was in standard 5 and I was loitering alongside the corridor as I was banquished from class as I (as usual) didn't do my homework. So I was sent out of class and I just thought I'd take a few extra strides. My life in primary school was quite a learning curve, initially in standard 1 I was a goody 2 shoes but by standard 2 I had an argument with this boy Nyanes (indian dude) and it involved us getting involved in a punch-up. I had a reputation of being a softie before that incident. I was later brought to the disciplin master's office and swatted on my legs with a feather duster. And the shame hurt more than the pain. But as I grew older, the shame started fading, and so getting whacked by a teacher was a norm, so much so I told the girl next to me, "Miss Sri is gonna hit my arm with the 1 metre ruler twice and tell me to get back to my seat. I rather take that than write my essay." So yes back to my loitering story, Pn Arisson- some pain in the neck lardball comes up to me and shouts what are you doing outside your class. So I told her I was chased out. And she asked which class and I said 5 Dahlia (the 2nd class- i dropped out of the first class cos i was dumb:) would you believe that...) And she refused to believe me. She took me to the headmaster, where I got a customary swatting again. Her plan was to check the records. And this lady was so spiteful she started checking the roster from the last class, 5 Teratai upwards. And when she was done, she found another punjabi boy's name and accused me of being Ranjeev and not Sanjeet. Ranjeev was in 5 Ros which was the 6th class. The fracas took up the whole period and Mrs Chan my English teacher came into the office and finally said I was from 5 Dahlia and she used these words, "He is surprisingly intelligent", pointing at my scruffy shirt that was partially untucked from all the running around before classes started.

So yes, in many ways I'm glad the look is here. Now to act intelligent. LOL, that i'm still working on.

Now back to my job at Dome, my admiration for waiters is incredible. Standing for 10 hours and literally waiting for customers is a real chore. Your feet turn sore as soon as you return home and the fatigue overrules the hunger. You just crash in bed only to wake up 4 hours later to have your dinner that had been waiting on the dinner table 7 hours ago. But on the brighter note, my parents missed having me around the house, so they made me opt for the afternoon shift and work only 5 hours a day and 20 hours a week (which is part time at Dome).

I was browsing thru the TV today and if I've noticed one thing, its that we're just getting more and more savage as the days run by. No not that Gaza conflict or that Sri Lankan - Tamil Tigers war, nor that prisoner that died in custody, although I was amazed in the papers that someone said we should not herald CRIMINALS as heroes and police as villains. Ah yes, the beauty of language, someone arrested is called a suspect, and only if he is tried in court can he be a Criminal. apparently not. Thank God I skipped Law and chose medicine, although many would agree I'd have been a very successful lawyer. At least as a doctor, my statements will have some credibility and no one can make a mockery of the healthcare of the country. Note to all the bravado's that're having processions, a good plan would be to steal each others slippers and get arrested for 2 weeks. confess to the crime and commit the crime in USJ. But make sure at least 200 of you are stealing at the same time. Don't be a menace to society, steal each other's shoe and not the general public's. Now flood the station and tell them you won't talk. And then when they torture you, in unison say that you forgot you lent each other the slippers/shoes and then say it was just a misunderstanding. Repeat the incident about 10 times and you shall get your revenge. Processions are too cliche la. I mean it was fun to read about at first but now its just boring.

And to all those who're rotting at home like Zalikha back in Bintulu. Be creative in life. Go and build a kite out of matchsticks and a paperbag. Then fly it as the wind blows strongly, and then light the string that you're holding with a lighter and watch the plane set ablaze. And shout Hell awaits all you sinners.
Fall on the ground, wiggle a little and say you had an epiphany.

IF that seems too extreme, dig your backyard for some grubs or worms or termites. Grab them all and put them in the middle of a news paper and burn all the sides. You'll see the sorry lil creatures run to the middle of the paper as the fire encroaches them. Even better if you can get snails. Add salt in the middle before burning and watch them die. And practice breaking bad news to the small kids that're wondering what in hell medical school did to you and say, Boy, I'm sorry to say, the snails have perished. I'll collect your soul tonight.


Or even better, collect your navel fluff in a bottle, then burn it.

As you can tell, pyromaniacism has recently struck me. It is just a way of venting my anger as I watch our world crumble. 10,000 migrant workers are sent back home from Dubai during the economic crunch, 70 ethnic Burmese are soon to be deported back to Burma as the Thai gov cracks down on them, although the Burmese men, which are about our age, that live in muck to earn a living claim that they will perish back home as they will be murdered. I choose to not get my emotions high, but I find it hard to believe that man made laws have inflicted more pain on each other than anything else. The economy was man's great feat, and yet a crumbling world economic crisis beckons. And all hopes lie on the shoulders of the Will Smith lookalike. And war, damn it why bother la.. Its a waste. If war is really necessary, do it like how Achilles did it, send the best man from each army and the winner takes all. As how the Minangkabau's used a hungry calf to defeat a raging bull. Who the hell wants to see a man with a rock take on a tank.

As you can tell my ideas are aplenty, but I am not taking sides. In war, I personally believe there are no protagonists. I'm just adding salt to the peanuts to give it a more acceptable taste:)


Also Appreciate Randomness. It is the only thing that keeps me sane at times. Randomness freaking rocks man.

like this one...


Thursday, January 8, 2009

Ascendo tuum









:)

For once I'm gonna let you find out what ascendo tuum means...

See in life, you'll have a group I affectionately call the dandelions:)
ah yes, them flowers which clog your nostrils with them pollen and irritate your eyes. Dandelions are carried off as the wind washes it away. Anonymity is something a dandelion possesses as no one ever knows which plant it came from, but once the plant has grown, we all bear witness to how fucked up it can turn out to be and have our suspicions on who the culprit was.

yeah i'm speaking in riddles, to sum things up, some people choose to remain anonymous while taking low pot shots. let me address you personally you TICK. You can suck the blood of a lion, and leave a scab on his torso, but you're so puny, he chooses to resist even scratching you. And the day you figure out how insignificant your contribution is to this world, I would take my applause with great pride. So yes, I should be ashamed of myself for letting a tick take a morsel of my sovereign blood. Little did i know I was even bitten. But being the self declared defender of the meek, you shall come back and read this post. Yes, you shall come back and read this post on my blog, for you are a sad puny tick that relies on my blood to survive. Do me a favour and stay off my turf:)
Pest control isn't what i applied for:)

I bid you adieu
ascendo tuum:)
(anonymous)